There has been a lot of attention in recent years on ADHD, Attention-Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder. What does it look like? What can you as a parent do to find out if your child is affected? What can you do to help? Is Tommy just being “all boy”, or is Katy just a daydreamer? Here are some facts to help answer these common questions. Most children with AD/HD do not display all of these symptoms, and a differential diagnosis needs to be made by a professional, not Mamaw or well meaning Aunt Grace.

You are the parent who realizes that your child is not beside you while shopping at Wal-Mart until you hear yourself paged to the customer service aisle. You list chores to your child that need to be done, only to have them stare at you and say “What did you want me to do?” or forget three out of four of them. You don’t eat out unless the restaurant plays loud music and has a lot of activity going on so that your family doesn’t stand out. Homework takes all night and you wonder what the teacher taught during the day because it all seems unfamiliar to you child. You feel guilty for your thoughts and feelings concerning this child and feel worn out.

Inattention manifests in several ways. Perhaps your child makes careless mistakes in their schoolwork, or does not pay attention to the details. Maybe you notice that he or she has trouble sticking to a play activity. For example, they want to play Clue, but by the time the game is set up, they lose interest and want to get out the Scrabble game. They seem to not listen to what is being said. Instructions are not followed such as circling the correct answer when called to underline their choice. Homework goes unfinished; chores are not completed. This child has trouble organizing themselves. Parents may notice that the child avoids activities that require mental effort such as homework or puzzles. He or she is constantly losing things such as books, pencils, toys or homework assignments. They are easily distracted from their tasks by things such as bird chirping or a car passing.

The other half of this disorder is hyperactivity-impulsivity. Signs of hyperactivity are just what it sounds like. This is the child that sometimes is hard to be around for extended amounts of time because they seem to be in constant motion. This is the “motor mouth”, the one who runs laps around the coffee table or engages in other types of excessive motion in situations where this is not appropriate such as at the mall, grocery store, or movie theater. If they are seated such as in church or school, they are squirming around and playing with their hands and swinging their feet (possibly kicking your seat!) if not jumping up every few minutes. Family mealtime and TV time is a source of frustration as the parents tire of the constant nagging to “just sit still”. They appear to possess so much energy that a quiet game of anything really is a difficult test for them. The impulsive side is characterized by interrupting conversations instead of waiting their turn to speak, and giving answers to yet unfinished questions.

These symptoms are seen in almost every child at some time, so what makes it a problem? In AD/HD children, these things occur more often and are more pronounced than is appropriate for their developmental age and it interferes with their social and academic performance. In other words, you may expect a child who is two years old to run about and not stay focused on a task, but by age seven, you would expect them to be quiet to some extent in a setting that required it such as school. This is usually seen before a child reaches seven years old, but may be dismissed and diagnosed later in life. Temper tantrums, bossiness and an insistence on getting what they want are frequently seen.

Sounds familiar? Parents of this type of child actually have a divorce rate three times greater than other couples. Friends are possibly shunning them, the home is in constant turmoil, parents feel that the child is doing this on purpose…So what is a parent supposed to do? There is no quick laboratory test to diagnose AD/HD. IQ tests have shown that scores from these children vary greatly with some testing in the gifted range. If you suspect that your child may have AD/HD, a psychologist should be consulted. Any medication suggested should be reviewed with them. Watch for signs of poor self-esteem, anxiety and depression.

Counseling can help a family function better and boost the low self-esteem of this child. Constant punishing doesn’t help because the acts are not deliberate. Structure and routine as well as keeping them as organized as possible make life easier. Clear specific instructions are easier for them to process. If there are two parents in the home, they need to present a united front. Be realistic and help your child develop needed skills. These often are very intelligent, creative children with a high energy level.

For more information please call Creative Family Solutions 985-331-1999