By Sue Ellen Ross Staff Reporter

If you want to be among the lucky few that follow through with their yearly promises to improve behavior, there are a few steps that may enable those goals to become a reality.

Before you follow any advice from anyone, make absolutely sure your determination to reach your goal (self-motivation) is present. And, that those goals are realistic.

The reason so many New Year’s resolutions fail is that the bad habits are integrated into the lifestyle we are now living. If they weren’t, we wouldn’t have the problems in the first place.

So, the first logical step is to mentally come to grips that your lifestyle has to change. Not just making one decision, but many decisions. Day after day, week after week until your goal is reached. Are you willing to make that commitment?

If so, the next step is a plan – written down in black-and-white. In order to build a house or design a suit, you have to have a blueprint or pattern that will take you ‘from here to there.’ This business of resolutions is no different.

You may want to go over this plan with someone who knows you well, since they may have some comments to add that would be of benefit.

If you feel better doing this on your own, by all means do so. The important thing is to have some type of paperwork to guide you.

Many bad habits are stress-related, so to break this vicious cycle, something has to give.

It sounds very simplistic to say ‘you must get more rest,’ but your body will actually thank you for it. A restful night can do wonders for your early morning perspective.

As you deal with making the decisions involved with an altered lifestyle, you will want to avoid situations that may tempt you with the behavior you are trying to toss aside.

If you want to stop drinking alcohol, don’t go to bars. And carry bottled water or soft drinks if you are going to a house party that will be serving liquor. You cannot totally escape the drinks and food you are trying to eliminate from your diet, remember, other people who don’t have problems with these behaviors will continue to eating and drinking whatever they like. That doesn’t mean you have to withdraw from the social scene completely.

You don’t want to avoid your family and friends because of your resolutions, so the next best thing is to be prepared when you are face-to-face with food or drink you are trying to avoid.

Take note, this is also one of the most important reasons that resolutions are broken: people don’t realize that you have to fill your disliked behavior pattern with another, more healthful one. Plan ahead. Eat something healthy before going to a party so your not starving, and focus on conversation once you get there, not the buffet table.

If you are trying to shed excess weight, eating proper foods goes without saying. Many people don’t realize that their perspective on food is so deep-rooted that they are resistant to change in this area. If every social event in your family is recognized by enough food to feed the troops in Iraq, you can try to change the menu to appetizers only, or healthy snacks.

If that idea doesn’t go over well with your family, and you are committed to your goals, you can eat your healthy meal at home before the party.

The final tip to remember when trying to stay true to your New Year’s resolutions: remember that you, alone, are ultimately responsible for your results, good or bad. You can’t blame anyone else.

You must want to change your behavior to make yourself act/feel/look better in healthy ways; in turn, those around you will benefit. A resolution made to try to please someone else, when you are not feeling 100 percent motivated toward success, is doomed to failure.

There is some sage advice in many of those ancient sayings regarding motivation. The basic message of all of them remains the same: if you don’t put yourself 100 percent into a goal, you will fail.

Know the difference of changing your behavior to someone else’s standard, and changing your behavior to your own realistic beliefs, and you will have the formula for a great New Year.