Harold Keller / L’Observateur / November 1, 2000

When speaking to small group assemblies at schools, I encourage student participation.

Last week while speaking at Bonnabel High School on the best insurance against drug use, I said that feeling good about yourself leaves no need for mood-altering drugs. Getting high is OK as long as you get high on life. Be excited about God’s planfor your life. Love yourself and you will never think about abusing your body withdamaging drugs.

I told the group I loved them and proceeded to tell them that the best definition of love that I’ve ever heard is wanting the best for someone without expecting anything in return. “What’s the opposite of love?” I then asked. As a rule, everyonesays, “hate.”This particular day at Bonnabel, one young girl in the front row said, “It’s not hate; it’s indifference.” She surprised me! “How did you know that?” I asked. “My daddytaught me what it was,” she answered. My next question was, “What does yourdaddy do?” “He’s dead,” she said, without much feeling. I then said, “He must havebeen a good daddy.” “No, he wasn’t,” she replied, coldly. He showed me firsthandwhat the opposite of love is. He was indifferent toward me.”I somehow felt that she would have welcomed even a little hate. At least she wouldhave known her dad was aware of her existence.

What do you say to a young, hurting girl that tells you something like that? It was one of the few times in my life that I was left without anything to say. The sadthing about that experience is that I was reminded of the many children who suffer the same relationship with their dads. They’re crying out for love, attention anddiscipline but receiving only an indifferent relationship that hurts more than hate.

Society often condemns the fathers who have deserted their families. In somecases, mothers do a better job alone. In my opinion, the father who does moredamage to a family is one who is present in body only – one who is indifferent toward the spiritual, mental and physical well-being of his wife and children.

Indifference – how many lives has it destroyed?

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