Leonard Gray / L’Observateur / April 1, 2000

Scientific tests have proven it to be so – I’m married to the Invisible Woman.

In fact, every vehicle she rides in likewise becomes invisible, which makes other drivers believe that vehicle is not there, especially when changing lanes or pulling out from a road or driveway.

It’s really scary riding with her. I’ve heard her stories of driving alone,including all the times she’s been cut off in traffic. However, not long ago,I experienced one of her “invisible moments” first hand and it was, indeed, a frightening experience.

She works at Jefferson Parish’s library headquarters in Metairie. I hadcome by one Saturday to meet her for lunch. I had parked my truck and wasriding in her car. She was still in the parking lot when a pickup trucksuddenly pulled out and slammed into the passenger side door – right where I was.

Now, I saw the truck starting to come. She had glanced aside for a momentand hadn’t seen it. The truck edged back so that the driver could look fortraffic. He didn’t see us, as we were invisible, thanks to my wife. Then heslammed back and into us.

The result was a little hole in the passenger side door and the smashing of the stereo speaker on that side. The door still opens and closes fine.We got out and exchanged information and he was astonished that he had struck anybody. He had looked and not seen us, never mind that we wereless than 15 feet away when he looked at her purplish-colored car.

It’s the only reasonable solution – she’s invisible.

My wife also tells me the problem exists in traffic itself when cars are continually cutting her off. A few days ago, while we were riding in thetruck near Avondale Shipyards, the car ahead of us slowed down to a near- stop, then abruptly U-turned into our path. Only my own keen sense ofdanger saved us from being struck. Obviously, my white truck had becomeinvisible because she was in it.

I’ve told her several times that when I’m alone, I rarely get cut off in traffic. She insists that I tailgate. I insist that it’s tailgating if I hitsomeone. I have never struck someone from behind, because I’m always incontrol of my vehicle’s speed and my ability to stop. You can’t call it”following too closely” because it’s not too close when I can stop in time.

I point out, to her chagrin, that she’s had more accidents than I’ve had. Herrebuttal is that she’s invisible.

Now I believe it.

It’s truly a frightening sensation, knowing you are in the right, knowing there is no good reason for you not to be seen by the other driver, and being hit anyway. Despite everything you can do, sometimes you will behit.

We were once in a car together (I was driving) and we pulled out from a stop, only to be hit by a drunk driver who hadn’t seen us.

Maybe there’s some grant money in this somewhere.

The Invisible Woman.

Leonard Gray is a reporter for L’Observateur.

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